Wine for my men....

It's the punchline of an old joke... but I noticed that after drinking a few glasses of wine last night, I am feeling bloated and uncomfortable today.

I counted the points for the wine, so it's not that I overindulged. But I got on the scale this morning and my weight had fluctuated up by several pounds over yesterday.

Since there are really no mistakes when you are learning a new lifestyle, I am just going to chalk it up to experience and know that I have to be particularly careful about how much wine I drink from now on. I think one or two glasses is the max. Which of course is far healthier anyway.

In other news, I had an absolutely spectacular dinner of grilled lamb, roasted ratatouille, grilled asparagus and bulgur wheat pilaf. It was so yummy.

And my mom gave me a vegetarian cookbook which has all the nutrition information for each recipe. I can't wait to start experimenting!

On Kirstie and other thoughts on a Friday

I watched a snippet of Kirstie Ally's interview with Oprah on youtube. She's gained back all of her weight after the Jenny Craig debacle... and now is touting her own weight loss program, on which she has claimed to have lost 20 lbs in 5 weeks.

Ugh.

Kirstie, we all know how to lose weight. That part isn't complicated.

When you have kept your weight off for a few years, then I might be interested to know your secrets. But until then, not so much.

In the mean time, I had Greek yogurt, half a banana, half a cup of pineapple and some fiber one cereal for breakfast.

Today I am eating healthy.

My list of why

I am reading a book that encourages it's readers to make a list of the reasons why we want to lose weight. I wrote mine out and realized that a bunch of these things are already happening, even after only shedding a few pounds.

So, while I am not really an 'affirmation' type of person, I rewrote it in the present tense. As time goes on, more and more of the items will, indeed, be present tense.

Here it is so far:

My outsides match my insides
More energy to play with my children
More stamina for drumming
Look good onstage
Professional appearance
Dance classes with Ladjie (in Mali!)
Fit into airplane seats better
Less obsessed with food
More time for projects
More time and energy for God
Healthier
Live longer
Less pain
Feel like a fabulous babe ;-)
Clothes that look good and fit comfortably
Better sexlife
Shopping for clothes is fun
Exercise is fun
I am spiritually, physically and emotionally stronger
I am able to do more things
I am less self concious when I eat in front of people
My doctor is proud of me
I am better able to serve God
I am comfortable in my own skin
My back doesn’t hurt anymore
I feel better about myself
I feel comfortable in a bathing suit
I am in control

Excercise

Weight watchers incents you to exercise by allowing you to 'trade' minutes of activity for more food during the week. It's a great concept! Last night I went dancing and earned 5 points. That is a normal ice cream cone, or 2 glasses of wine with dinner, or an extra serving of steak.

The fact is, for me, excersize for it's own sake is kind of a drag. I like working out with weights, especially my upper body, because it helps with my drumming. I like to ride a bike. I love dancing. Walking the dog is ok, too. But treadmills. Ugh. It's just not sustainable.

So I am thinking I need to figure out a way to get more activity going. Maybe take an African dance class, or salsa lessons. Whatever it is, it has to be more like a hobby than a chore. I rarely have to force myself to practice my drum. I want to feel that way about whatever activity I choose, too.

According to WW I am down 7.8 lbs. so far. In reality, though, I have lost more than that because I had started eating better even before going to my first meeting. So my pants are loose. I bought some shirts yesterday in a smaller size and can truly feel a difference already in my energy level. This is good.

Why now? Why this? Revisted....

I have been visiting a blog by a woman who has lost over 130 lbs. She is an opera singer... and said in a recent post that part of why she wants to keep her weight off is that she is taken more seriously as a performer when she is fit and healthy.

For me, that rings true. I am not a performer yet, but hope that someday I will be playing my djembe in public. And when that day comes, I will feel a lot better if the focus is on my music and not my body.

I can think of dozens and dozens of reasons why I want to be a healthy size. Maybe I am going to make a list and put them in a jar so when things get tough, and they will, I can pull them out to inspire me.

And, just a brief check-in about the food plan I am on. I am doing Weight Watchers and am really really loving it. What a great program! It is brilliantly designed to encourage you to make healthy food choices... and they really feel like choices, not deprivation. Today I was hungry and was considering buying a protein bar. When I realized how high in points they were, I decided to wait the few minutes until I could get home and make a snack of vegetarian refried beans, pico de gallo and low fat cheddar. The same 3 points and a LOT more filling.

So far I have shed about 7 lbs. Slow and steady wins the race, I say.

And thanks to everyone who is keeping me in their prayers. I think it is working!

Why?

Why now? Why this?

Health. Yeah. That's a big piece of it. My BMI isn't in a healthy range.

But I think the trip to Africa might have something to do with it, too.

When I was in Africa, it was the first time I was really seen. Strangers saw me, not as a fat woman, but as a woman. It was an amazing experience. And not just men, either, though that was kind of fun. My women friends really saw me, too.

I liked it.

And I realized that one consequence of being fat is that people don't really see you. It is easy to hide, even for me. When I am among strangers, they don't see me.

I guess at this point, I believe that it is time for the various parts of my life to be in concert with one another. Taking care of myself physically goes hand in hand with taking care of myself emotionally and spiritually.

Because, well, I have nothing to hide. It is time for me to stop hiding.

Easter.... HEALTHY

Yeah, I did great, foodwise, over Easter.

On Saturday I went to my in-laws for a party and brought a decadent dessert. But you know what? I didn't have any of it. And the truth is, I really didn't WANT any of it. How's that for a miracle?

Instead, at the party I ate lunch and dinner (our family gatherings are usually marathons, LOL.) and didn't eat any snacks between and while I didn't write down the points, I know I made some good choices. (How would one count a Vietnamese squid salad, anyway?

Yesterday the moveable feast was at my house, with roasted lamb and bulgar pilaf and ratatouille. I drank a few glasses of wine (and wrote them in my food log!) and had a single serving for dinner and think I did pretty well all things considered.

Then, to break my fast from sweets, I had a haystack cookie that I made the night before. They are really delicious and not that bad for you, either.

Here's my recipe:

5 pieces of Dove dark chocolate
2 Tbs natural peanut butter
1 cup fiber one cereal

Nuke the chocolate and peanut butter in a glass bowl until the chocolate is just starting to melt. (About a minute) Stir. Microwave again for a few seconds if necessary.

Stir the cereal into the melted chocolate and peanut butter and stir gently to coat thoroughly. Lay out a piece of parchment paper. Scoop the mixture into 9 mounds using 2 tablespoons. Place in the refrigerator to harden the chocolate.

Each cookie has 1 point and is pretty drop dead delicious.